A woman hit me with a burger just as Rebecca told the crowd I'd been sneaking around with the rich married man down the street. Her only evidence was a cropped hug, but gossip had done the rest. Then his 14-year-old daughter reached for the projector remote and asked everyone to stay for two videos.
When I moved into my little rental house, I thought the hardest part would be assembling the furniture.
I was wrong.
I was 26, single, and had moved in two months earlier.
Rebecca disliked me immediately.
I was wrong.
On moving day, she stood beside my driveway holding a mug that said GOOD VIBES ONLY.
"Living here alone?" she asked.
"Well, we're a family neighborhood."
I glanced around.
"Living here alone?"
"That's nice."
"Young women tend to have a lot of visitors."
"My biggest visitor is usually the delivery driver," I said.
Rebecca didn't laugh.
Before leaving, she explained the trash schedule and which neighbors were "sensitive."
"That's nice."
She seemed determined to add me to her files.
***
Richard, his wife Amber, and their 14-year-old daughter Sophie lived three houses down in the largest home on the street.
Last Tuesday afternoon, I found a phone lying on the sidewalk near his driveway.
Its screen lit up.
Amber calling.
I found a phone lying on the sidewalk.
I recognized the family photograph on the lock screen.
Without answering, I carried it to Richard's front door.
He opened it looking worried.
He took the phone.
I recognized the family photograph.
"I must've dropped it unloading groceries."
He gave me a quick hug.
"You're a lifesaver, Sabrina."
Then he stepped back.
He gave me a quick hug.
"Want a cookie? Sophie and I baked some."
"Are they edible?"
I stepped inside, accepted a chocolate chip cookie, and left a few minutes later.
I didn't notice Rebecca watching from across the street.
"Are they edible?"
***
That evening, my phone started buzzing while I ate dinner.
I opened the neighborhood Facebook group.
There was a photograph of Richard hugging me.
Rebecca had cropped it tightly.
No phone.
No doorway.
Just his arms around my shoulders.
There was a photograph of Richard hugging me.
Her caption read:
"Watch your husbands, ladies! She's on the hunt!"
The comments were worse.
"I knew something was off about her."
"Watch your husbands, ladies! She's on the hunt!"
I started typing an explanation.
Before I finished, my phone rang.
Amber.
"Stay away from my husband."
"Amber, I found Richard's phone. That's all."
My phone rang.
"Don't insult me."
"I'm telling you the truth."
"Believe me, I can ruin your life! And I will! Stay away from my husband, or it'll get even worse!" Amber snapped.
My hand tightened around the phone.
"You're threatening me over a photograph?"
"Don't insult me."
She hung up.
I called Richard.
"Sabrina, I'm sorry," he said. "I told Amber what happened."
"She doesn't believe you."
"Rebecca claims she's seen you here before."
I called Richard.
"What? I've never visited your house."
"I know." He sounded exhausted. "I'll talk to Amber again."
***
By morning, Rebecca's post had more than 60 comments.
Even my landlord forwarded the post, asking whether there was trouble with the neighbors.
I explained that I'd returned a phone.
Rebecca's post had more than 60 comments.
And the annual neighborhood barbecue was that afternoon.
I nearly stayed home.
Then I imagined Rebecca telling everyone I'd hidden because I was guilty.
So I put on jeans and a yellow T-shirt and walked to the shared green beside Richard's house.
I nearly stayed home.
Children ran between picnic tables while burgers smoked on the grill.
A projector waited for the neighborhood slideshow.
Then people noticed me.
Conversations stopped.
Rebecca stood near the drinks table, surrounded by neighbors.
People noticed me.
When she saw me, she smiled.
"Well. Look who decided to join us."
"Hello, Rebecca," I greeted.
"Showing up to a barbecue?" I asked.
"Look who decided to join us."
"Showing up here after yesterday."
I stopped.
"You posted a lie about me."
Rebecca raised her eyebrows.
"I posted a photograph!"
"Showing up here after yesterday."
"And invented the rest."
"I was simply warning people."
She lifted her drink.
"Some women don't respect marriages."
"I was simply warning people."
"I returned a lost phone."
"That's your story, darling."
Around us, people pretended not to listen.
I spotted Amber near the grill.
"Amber, could we talk?"
"I returned a lost phone."
She kept arranging buns on a tray.
"I have nothing to say to you," she snapped without looking up.
"I'm not after your husband, Amber. Believe me."
"Please leave my family alone."
Richard approached.
"I have nothing to say to you."
"Amber, she's telling the truth."
Rebecca appeared beside him.
"Richard, darling, nobody's accusing you," she cooed.
I turned toward her.
"That's exactly what you're doing."
"She's telling the truth."
She gave me a pitying look.
"There's no need to get emotional."
I wanted to scream.
Instead, I stepped away.
***
At the food table, I reached for a paper plate.
I wanted to scream.
A woman moved in front of me.
"Maybe you should take your food somewhere else."
"You're making people uncomfortable."
"I'm here for the barbecue."
"Maybe you should take your food somewhere else."
"Then take this and go."
She snatched the burger from her plate and tossed it toward me.
It struck my yellow shirt before dropping onto the grass, leaving a streak of mustard across the fabric.
I froze.
"Then take this and go."
The woman stared at her empty plate.
"Well, you shouldn't have stood so close," she muttered.
Someone offered me a napkin.
Nobody apologized.
I pressed it against my shirt, trying to stop my hands from shaking.
Nobody apologized.
"Hey."
A girl stood beside me holding a soda.
"Sabrina, right? I'm Sophie."
Richard and Amber's daughter.
She looked at my stained shirt.
A girl stood beside me holding a soda.
"That was awful."
"Not my favorite barbecue," I whispered.
"Don't worry. I can prove you only returned Dad's phone."
I stared at her.
"How?"
"That was awful."
"My wildlife camera records our front yard."
"I set it up by the hedge to watch rabbits. It records movement across the sidewalk, driveway, and front door."
"You recorded what happened?"
"Yep. Dad and I checked it."
"My wildlife camera records our front yard."
"Does your mom know?"
"I tried showing her last night. She told me to stay out of grown-up business." Sophie rolled her eyes. "So I'm making it everyone's business."
She pointed toward the projector.
"I helped set that up. I'll show everyone the footage in ten minutes."
"Thank you."
"Does your mom know?"
"But there's another video," she whispered.
Sophie smiled.
"After everyone sees it, I bet Rebecca will put her house up for sale tomorrow."
"What video?"
"Let's just say Mom's going to be very interested."
"There's another video."
***
Sophie walked to the projector and picked up the microphone.
"Attention, everyone! Come closer! You're about to see a show!"
Someone called, "Is this the summer slideshow?"
"Not exactly," Sophie said.
She pressed the remote.
"You're about to see a show!"
An empty sidewalk appeared.
Then I appeared.
I stopped near Richard's driveway, bent down, and picked up the phone.
The timestamp was visible.
I walked to his door.
An empty sidewalk appeared.
He opened it.
I handed him the phone.
He hugged me for barely two seconds.
We stepped inside.
Sophie switched to another clip showing me leaving minutes later.
Richard stepped forward.
He hugged me for barely two seconds.
"Sabrina returned my phone. I told Amber that evening."
Amber stared at the screen.
Then at him.
Rebecca coughed.
"Well, nobody knows what happened inside."
"Sabrina returned my phone."
"My daughter and I were baking cookies," Richard said. "Sabrina stayed a few minutes."
"Two cookies," Sophie added. "Dad burned the first batch."
Amber's face remained stiff.
She turned toward Rebecca.
"You told me there had been other visits."
"Sabrina stayed a few minutes."
Rebecca shifted.
"I said people should be careful."
"No. You said you'd seen them."
Sophie reached for the remote.
"Actually, there's something else."
"I said people should be careful."
The second video began.
Rebecca appeared outside Richard's gate wearing enormous sunglasses and carrying a watering can.
There wasn't a plant in sight.
Someone snorted.
A delivery driver pulled up with a package.
The second video began.
Rebecca hurried over, pointed toward Richard's house, and began questioning him.
The driver looked confused, checked the address, and walked past her to deliver the package.
When he returned, Rebecca followed him to his van.
She waved her watering can until he rolled down the window.
Then she leaned in.
Rebecca followed him to his van.
The watering can tipped.
Water poured straight down the front of her trousers.
The crowd burst out laughing.
Rebecca jumped back, frantically brushing at her legs.
The horrified driver handed her a packet of tissues.
The crowd burst out laughing.
Rebecca took them, then pulled out her phone.
As the driver leaned through the window to check whether she was all right, she raised her phone and snapped a picture of him.
Sophie paused the video.
"Mom, remember the man Rebecca said was stopping outside our house to meet Dad?"
She snapped a picture of him.
Amber stared.
"The one she said was hiding something?" Amber asked.
Sophie nodded.
Then she displayed Rebecca's photograph beside the footage.
It showed the driver leaning from his van, his uniform conveniently cropped out.
"The one she said was hiding something?"
"So mysterious," Sophie said. "He was giving her tissues."
Rebecca's face reddened.
"He was behaving suspiciously!"
Amber folded her arms.
"You told me he was meeting Richard!"
"He was giving her tissues."
"I was investigating!"
"With a watering can?" someone called.
Rebecca straightened.
"I was watering my plants!"
A neighbor pointed toward the screen.
"I was investigating!"
"Rebecca, that's a concrete sidewalk."
The laughter grew louder.
Sophie smiled.
"Maybe the plants were undercover."
Even Richard laughed.
The laughter grew louder.
Rebecca stared at the frozen image of herself, still gripping the watering can.
She had no answer.
The laughter faded as Amber stepped toward her.
"You knew he was a delivery driver. You sent me that photograph anyway."
Rebecca tightened her grip on her drink.
She had no answer.
"I was only trying to help!"
Rebecca looked around.
Nobody answered.
A man near the drinks table spoke.
"I was only trying to help!"
"Rebecca, didn't you post a picture of a plumber outside my house last month?"
"He was fixing my sink."
Another woman crossed her arms.
"And that unfamiliar car you warned everyone about? It belonged to my sister."
"He was fixing my sink."
Rebecca's cheeks reddened.
"I can't be expected to know everything!"
"No," I said.
Everyone turned toward me.
I was still holding the mustard-stained napkin.
Rebecca's cheeks reddened.
"You could have asked me what happened."
Rebecca looked down at her drink.
Paul, the neighborhood Facebook group's moderator, stepped forward.
"Rebecca, your post about Sabrina needs to come down."
"I can explain..."
"You could have asked me what happened."
"Not another explanation. A correction."
For once, nobody leaned toward Rebecca to hear her latest news.
Richard came to stand beside me.
"I'm sorry this got so far," he said.
"It shouldn't have gotten anywhere."
"Not another explanation."
He nodded.
Across the lawn, Sophie lowered the microphone.
She gave me a crooked smile.
"Well, maybe Rebecca will just move to another street."
I laughed despite myself.
She gave me a crooked smile.
Then I noticed Amber walking toward me.
Her face was pale.
Rebecca watched from beside the drinks table.
I folded the stained napkin in my hand and waited.
Amber stopped a few feet away.
Her face was pale.
For a moment, neither of us spoke.
Then she looked at my shirt.
"Did someone do that to you?"
I glanced at the mustard stain.
"Apparently, returning a phone is a serious offense around here."
She looked at my shirt.
Amber blinked hard.
I said nothing.
"I called you and threatened you," she added. "I wouldn't let Richard explain. I wouldn't even listen to my own daughter."
"Why?"
I said nothing.
Amber rubbed her thumb across her wedding ring.
"Rebecca kept sending me pictures. She said there were things Richard wasn't telling me."
"Yes."
I looked toward Rebecca, who was pretending to study her phone.
"Rebecca kept sending me pictures."
"You believed a woman who barely knows me over the people who actually do."
Amber wiped her cheek.
"I did. And I was wrong."
Richard joined us, but he let his wife speak.
"I want to correct this publicly," Amber said. "I'll post in the neighborhood group tonight."
"I was wrong."
"Then please don't call it a misunderstanding," I requested. "Tell them you accused me without checking. Tell them you threatened me."
Amber nodded.
"And I want Rebecca's original post removed."
"Paul's already handling that," Richard said.
"Tell them you threatened me."
Amber hesitated.
"I know you don't have to forgive me."
She accepted that without arguing.
Then she glanced toward the food table.
"I know you don't have to forgive me."
"I also saw what happened with the burger. That woman owes you an apology."
I loosened my grip on the stained napkin.
Sophie approached with a fresh napkin and a chocolate chip cookie.
"I figured you deserved something better than a burger."
"That woman owes you an apology."
I laughed.
"Is this one safe?"
"Dad made it, so approximately!"
Richard groaned.
"You're never letting that go, are you?"
"Nope."
"Is this one safe?"
Sophie handed me the cookie.
"Sorry Mom didn't listen to me yesterday."
Amber reached for her daughter's hand.
"I'm sorry too, sweetheart."
Sophie shrugged.
"Next time, maybe check the video before threatening somebody."
"Sorry Mom didn't listen to me yesterday."
Richard covered his mouth.
I suspected he was hiding a smile.
Amber sighed.
***
The next morning, I woke to 23 notifications.
I suspected he was hiding a smile.
Amber had posted a correction.
She explained that I'd found Richard's phone and returned it.
She acknowledged accusing and threatening me without checking the facts.
Richard added a comment confirming everything.
Paul removed Rebecca's original accusation.
Amber had posted a correction.
Several neighbors apologized.
The woman responsible for the burger sent a private message.
It began, "I'm sorry you felt embarrassed."
I stared at those words.
Then I replied, "You threw a burger at me and blamed me for standing too close. That's what needs an apology."
Several neighbors apologized.
An hour later, another message arrived.
"I threw the burger at you. It was cruel, and you didn't deserve it. I'm sorry."
I read it, then set my phone facedown.
***
That afternoon, I watered the plants on my porch.
Rebecca came outside to collect her mail.
Another message arrived.
Usually, she'd have something to say about my visitors, my gardening, or the position of my trash cans.
This time, she kept her eyes on the envelopes.
I nodded.
She muttered something and disappeared indoors.
This time, she kept her eyes on the envelopes.
I went back to watering my basil.
A few days later, Richard and Sophie stopped by carrying homemade cookies.
"Thank you again for returning my phone," Richard said.
Sophie held up the plate.
"We brought these outside so nobody can invent a scandal about the kitchen."
"Thank you again for returning my phone."
I burst out laughing.
Across the street, Rebecca appeared beside her mailbox.
Sophie noticed.
So did I.
I burst out laughing.
"Richard," I said, loudly enough to carry, "you'd better keep hold of that phone. I can't afford another neighborhood scandal."
He patted his pocket.
Sophie grinned.
"I can't afford another neighborhood scandal."
Rebecca turned and went inside.
Richard offered me another cookie.
I took it.
And this time, I stayed on my porch.
Rebecca turned and went inside.